Friday, November 24

Be Lazy be Lucky: an emperical study

Life is a bitch..(and to complete the, cliche occasionally you marry one). Don't you just detest morbid characters? the perpetually depressed variety (aka Nirupa Roy / A.K.Hangal)? But then, all of us have been down at some point in time; whether is is a relationship going down the gutter, a lost job, nicotine withdrawal symptoms when one makes a (foolish) attempt to quit, or simply at the gross stupidity of people like the Climate Alliance (Re: Breitta's paper footprint suitcase). Just when the world seems to be a dark miserable place (or the inside of Embassy Club in London which is about the same).. one comes across people who are actually scraping the bottom of the barrel and lo and behold, the world is suddenly a much brighter place!!

Meet John Lyne, of Stainforth, near Doncaster (A small hick town near Rotherham and Sheffield whose claim to fame is an Audi service centre or so Len Richards Esq. informed me some 3 years ago). Latest among his illustrious encounters (or lack thereof) with lady luck, is a rather sudden trip down a manhole resulting in his back, left leg and both knees being a tad worse for the wear. That illustrious career began rather early when as a child he fell off a horse and cart and was run over by a delivery van. As a teenager, he fell from a tree and broke his arm. On his way home from hospital - on Friday 13th (no less!) - the bus he was in crashed, provoking another fracture in the same arm. Since then, he's been hit by lightning twice, fallen victim to a rock-fall in a mine, has nearly drowned and has enjoyed three car crashes. (News courtesy El Reg). This guy must spend a fortune on car and life insurance !!

Now this makes me feel really good about the time when my best friends were doctors and nurses (longest relationship with the white coats was 6 months), or when a cousin and I charred his house wiring in an attempt to create an electromagnet (using AC - he went on to become an engineer and is currently a risk consultant), or when I single handedly decided to test the vapourising potential of 110v DC. Though I can safely say that luck was on my side - cant say the same for folks and assorted aunts and uncles who were at the receiving end!

Therefore that slob on the couch in possession of the remote is NOT lazy! He is just making sure he is there when lady luck comes calling (Unlike lightning-never-strikes-twice John) or would you rather have him attempt repairs on the busted micro? Gives new meaning to "let sleeping dogs lie" doesn't it? - Are you ladies listening ......

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